“If you want to be successful, find someone who has achieved the results you want and copy what they do and you'll achieve the same results.”

- Tony Robbins

Why some successful female business owners are heading for a crash

You thought passion, hard work and business acumen would be enough to carry you through your journey as an exceptional, successful business owner

What you didn’t realise was the toll that the mental and physical stress of running your own business, the constant juggling, multi-tasking, managing staff and keeping your family happy would have on your well-being. You are worn out. Your passion has dimmed. Your friends’ and family’s support has worn thin.

You are heading for a crash if you do not take measures to get on top of those sleepless nights, lack of energy, depression, anxiety and panic attacks, and the feeling of loneliness that nobody seems to understand.

So, what’s actually going on?

1. You’ve lost the awareness and control of your physical body

After working long hours for years, you don’t seem to have enough energy to keep you going. You need coffee to kickstart the morning and a few more cups to get through the afternoon dip. You grab quick bites to eat when you rush to the next appointment. How you’ve been living your life has led to overweight, poor sleep and a lack of energy. You seem to have become sluggish, less efficient and spending more time at work and fewer hours with your family.

How to retrain your body to drop off to a deep sleep on demand

First, you need to be aware of what’s going on in your physical body; what you’ve been feeding it, how you’ve been using it, whether there has been any regular maintenance work to recharge your battery.

Secondly, you need to tweak and develop a constructive routine that supports and nourishes the physical body.

Thirdly, you need to practise offering your body with short and clear instructions. Your subconscious mind (the body-mind connection) is your loyal servant and ready to take on anything that you ask it to do.

I could just talk about this as a health coach, then you would have to do all the hard work yourself. Instead, I facilitate relaxation, opening up your mind, removing any energy blockages and replenishing your body with fresh energy so that you experience instant tranquillity as if you’ve just had a great night’s sleep.

Strategise, plan and instil a routine that takes care of your body to take care of your business

Lilian came to see me about poor sleep and lack of energy. She was not rested and would wake up feeling tired and couldn’t function. She often felt more tired after lunch and couldn’t focus.

I suggested that she keep track of her daily habits for 7 days, focusing on what she ate and drank, what exercise she did, and how much sleep she got. When we analysed her habits, she realised just how much things had changed gradually down a slippery slope.

The solution was simple but not easy, because Lilian needs to prepare a healthy lunch rather than grab whatever is available when she’s hungry. She has also incorporated a twice daily breathing exercise that has not only given her the energy she needs but also a number of other health benefits. Doing her favourite strength training at the end of the day with her children means that she can blow off steam as well as having a fun bonding session together with them.

With the weekly energy injection and her new routine, she can now drop off to deep sleep in seconds. She says “my sleep issues were affecting terribly on my energy and performance as I did not wake up refreshed and it used to take some time to kick off in the mornings. Now that I am able to fall asleep easily, I feel better in the morning with clarity and focus and therefore I am able to get more things done in the mornings.” She has been more present with her staff and listens with full attention to their complaints and deals with any issues in their infancy head-on before they become major problems. She is working more effectively and efficiently, which means that she can finish work at a reasonable hour and have time to relax before another busy day.

Enthusiasm alone is insufficient to sustain your energy levels for staying in the game. You also need to look after yourself in the same way that you look after your business. It takes about 90 days to ingrain new habits, so putting together a plan will help you create a new routine that supports your health and gives you more energy for running your business and caring for your family.

2. Untreated stress could lead to a mental, emotional and physical meltdown

Many business women are juggling work and family, and feeling guilty about neglecting their family when they are at work and then worrying about things at work when they are with their family. Endless demands from their business and concerns about the cash flow, staff issues and unsurmountable challenges can lead to stress, which if untreated could lead to mental, emotional and physical meltdown.

How to shift your mental, emotional and physical states in seconds

First, you must identify the triggers for your undesirable states. You need to interrupt the patterns of your automatic response.

Secondly, you need to build your mental emotional muscles in the same way as you would training your body by going to the gym every week. So, no matter what happens in your business or personal life, you can get yourself out of the pit of negative emotion and keep moving forward again.

3. You've lost your way in the mist of your "reality"

Many female business owners feel that they lack support. They don’t want to worry their family with all the concerns from their business. They can’t talk to their friends who might tell them to get a ‘real job’. They can’t share any inner thoughts with their staff. Some hardly have any conversations about themselves or their business for weeks or months at a time. Without a sounding board, they sometimes feel lost in the day-to-day running of their business.

It doesn’t have to be this way.

What are you here for on this planet earth?

It’s important to have someone who is impartial and not connected to your business or family to share your thoughts with – ideally, a conversation partner who has business and personal development knowledge and experience. Someone who provides a safe space for you to get things off your chest, to say things you know will be kept confidential. Someone who can help you understand your individuality, your strengths, where you need support and explain the meaning of the challenges you are experiencing.

Find the map of your life path, understand the meanings of your experience to find fulfilment

Beverley has been laying low for the past 10 years after the initial huge success in her 20s. She took a bit of a hit by having to take care of her elderly parents and then her mentally ill husband for many years until their passing. Although she started her own business again in recent months, she doesn’t seem to have the same level of confidence and thinks that her earlier success was just a fluke and that she is an imposter.

After extensive sharing with me as her conversation partner, what soon became transparent after studying Beverley’s life path is that Beverley was living her life, daring and thinking outside of the box in her 20s and early 30s; and taking on the caring roles in her 40s and 50s. When I looked at her natal Chinese astrology chart, it indicated that all the experience coincided with the changes in her life. It’s now time for her to stretch out of her comfort zone once again to shine and complete the cycle and return to who she truly is.

What Beverley has come to terms with is that through her enduring experience, she has gained great understanding of the opposite perspectives to her own. She would have not known about the light if she had never experienced darkness. Now, with the acquired wisdom, it is her time to consciously express her true self and fearlessly claim her place in the business world once again.

Beverley has since published a book based on her life’s experience. She has started mentoring young entrepreneurs with her prolific business acumen and experience. She feels that she’s been given a new lease of life. She appreciated our conversations because everything was explained and made sense to her. She can now view life through a new lens with a deeper and newer meaning to all the experience she has in this life time.

Einstein said: “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” It’s all too easy to get caught up in the day-to-day of your business and not be able to see the bigger picture from a higher perspective. That’s why having a conversation partner, who “can listen and offer non-judgemental and unbiased feedback is a very useful support”. You develop new insights into your strengths and purpose in life, you get to connect to the infinite opportunities. You transform yourself and transform your relationships with others, and feel understood, supported and loved. You find inner trust, faith and peace with reignited passion and purpose.

Conclusion

Enthusiasm and business skills alone are insufficient to take your business to the next level. Say yes to support along the way.

Most business owners put their own needs last. But you actually need to look after yourself first, if you want to sustain the enthusiasm, passion and energy you had when you started your own business, and build a successful business that fulfils you, your staff and your clients.

My 3-step to happiness online programme is designed to help female business owners take back control of their body, emotion and space so that they can experience the excitement of running a business, enjoy the fulfilment of helping their clients, and still have quality time and energy for themselves and their families. You can have it all – you just need some help along the way.

If you’d like me to understand better of your unique situation and offer you some personalised advice, you can book a 30-minute, no-obligation zoom call with me at https://calendly.com/thestressreliever/